We may be gluttons for punishment, but truth be told, RIE and Montessori teachers find joy in good old fashioned CONFLICT. 

We don't have to wait long- the roots of conflict begin at infancy and mature right on up through Kindergarten.  Having an intact developmental plane (birth - six years) and an experienced Mentor teaching faculty allows us to support the process of CONFLICT RESOLUTION  in developmentally appropriate ways which enable the child to learn pro-social skill sets and inner discipline.  End result-  a cooperative, empathetic and active participant in the community.

Knowing if, when and how to intercede is the dance we play.  The adult's role is to monitor physical and emotional safety while allowing for the parties involved to struggle through to problem solve on their own.  At infancy, one may just move on- not really vested in the struggle, but wanting an object in motion.  At toddlerhood, support in communication as verbal skills are blossoming is key while helping the child regulate feelings of frustration while in the heat of it.  And, as your child's cognitive abilities develop, you will soon see complex negotionation skills, bartering and the like begin to take hold with little or no adult supervision.  A six year process for sure, but so worth the wait!

Over the past five years, though, we've witnessed a disturbing change in the natural learning opportunities conflict resolution presents.  Not so much in the physical conflict that naturally develops as children learn to navigate respectfully through space and control emotional impulses, but rather an increase in RELATIONALLY AGGRESSIVE conflict- even amoungst children who have been together practically their entire lives.

It wasn't until I came across the recent publication of Nurture Shock (Bronson & Merryman) that I found a plausible rationale for what we are witnessing in the classroom.  And, wouldn't you know it- TELEVISION- again!  I'll spare you the entire chapter which runs some ten pages in length and leave you with a point to ponder:

"The more educational media the children watched, the more relationally agressive they were.  This wasn't a small effect.  It was stronger than the connection between violent media and physical agression."  (p180)

For us as teachers, watching parents pull up with DVD players on, shrugging shoulders when we express how the tv is interfering with their child's daily activities at school, or expecting us to fix at school an exposure outside our control that is so damaging to your child's brain, is probably the most frustrating component of our work.  Still, we trust in the elasticity of the child and that she is IN there and that parents will do anything to ensure that their babies get the very best start in life. 

We're not telling families that you can't watch television with your children- that's your choice.  We're just highlighting that WARNING LABEL on the package.